7 Terrible Things You Will Learn From Your 9-5
Written by Brett Brostrom, Posted on , in Section Hero Articles
When you have a job that requires you to be there from 9 am to 5 pm, you’ll learn some really neat (or terrible) things about yourself that you never could have imagined possible. Some are good and some are, well, terrible.
1. You Will Figure Out Exactly How Quickly You Can Get Ready In The Morning
Getting up and ready in the morning is a dreadful experience if you’re not a morning person. When you have to be to your job at 9 in the morning, you will figure out down to the second exactly how much time it takes you to get ready and drive to the office.
2. You Will Memorize Your Co-Workers Bathroom Schedules
You won’t want to, but it will happen. There’s even a smartphone app where you can enter in your salary/hourly wage and you clock in when you go to the bathroom. If you keep up with it, you can earn a significant amount of money just by using the restroom.
3. You Will Be Amazed At How Much You Can Eat
You go to lunch, and that’s nice. But when you get back to the office, someone ordered pizza for everyone and that’s even better. Then it’s someones birthday, so why not have some cake? The next thing you know, you’ve gained 30 pounds and you hate yourself.
4. The Littlest Things Will Make You Irrationally Angry
There’s always that one person that when they speak, you snap. This same douche bag listens to music at his desk without headphones and it’s usually pretty terrible music. They probably also where crocs.
5. The Weekend Days Are The Two Shortest Days Of Your Life
Enough Said.
6. You Will Worship The Gods of the IT Department
If something goes wrong with your computer, or the printer, or the internet, chances are you can’t fix it yourself and even if you could you probably aren’t allowed to. Some of your favorite websites might be blocked. The IT guys hold the keys to your freedom and salvation.
7. 5 PM Is More Important Than Your Firstborns Birthday
You’ve made it through another day of stress, torture, and boredom. You can finally go home and do what you want. Finally.
