10 Things Happy, Confident People Dont Really Believe
29October

10 Things Happy, Confident People Dont Really Believe

Posted on , in Section Happiness

There are often lists of the secrets of "happy" people and what they do--but what about what they don't do? Are there some things they really try to not indulge in?

 

1. “I’m not as good as they are.” 

It really doesn’t matter. If you’re not doing just what someone else is, it doesn’t make your contribution any less valuable. You can’t measure your success by comparing it to someone else. Success is making yourself better at something—not as good as someone else is at it.

2. “What other people say about you doesn’t matter.”

While you should not be constantly preoccupied with someone's opinions of you,don't allow someone else to speak negatively about you, especially to others. You must show enough respect for yourself in order to continually gain it from others.

3. “Always say what you want to—be true to yourself.”

While this holds some weight, it is also important to note that everything you say has a consequence, good or bad. It is never a good idea to just spout off, unaware of who your audience is. Respect goes a long way.

4. “Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, guess I’ll go eat worms.”

Impossible. There is someone in your life that loves and encourages you, and it is important not to lose sight of that. You’re not always going to like what you do, and neither is everybody else, but the important thing is to press on.

5. “I’m way too old.”

Says who? I can’t count how many people 60+ years of age that I have had in my college classes with me. And besides, being older means even more that you know what the hell you are doing. So go do it.

6. “Once I accomplish _______, then I’ll be happy.”

Sure you will—if you determine that you are going to be happy either way. You have got to find the happiness in your “now,” while your working towards your “then.” Otherwise, “then” will never feel they way you want it to.

7. “I will control my own destiny.”

Well, that’s a good plan—but even the “best laid plans” can go awry. It is impossible to be in complete control of your life. Things will be thrown at you, but there’s no saying that you can’t push past it. Be in control of your response to destiny.

8. “I will know I’m successful when I am happy all of the time.”

Hardly. Even happy people get sad—it’s impossible not to. Constant happiness does not signify success. The knowledge that things will sometimes get bad and that you will do your best to be okay despite it—that is personal success.

9.  “I need to live without regret.”

No. You need to live with regret—and learn from it. If we no longer regret a mistake we made, will we be doomed to make it again? Regret reminds us of the things that we never want to do again—so take it with you and be stronger for it.

10. “Keep your emotions private.”

Never lie to anyone about your feelings—including yourself. Your feelings are who you are—and what you think is important. If something makes you uncomfortable, confront it and ask yourself why. Never tell yourself that your feelings on anything are invalid—they may not be immediately demanding. But they are there—and so are you.